fuck this

sold my iphone

my "boyfriend" sent me a flip phone and ipod

i ordered mad books from amazon

i am extremely passive now

i've been doing nothing but reading

haven't watched television since october 2008 - when i started getting high

gonna break this laptop in half soon

i'm in buffalo.

eye'm a natural disaster.

eye love how everything we had only exists in our heads. shit no one ever reads, things only we've said. eye never considered monogamy as *insert something witty*. it's the worst when you have to re write the shit a hundred times before getting it right. before sending yes, before sending a long letter (to the one you loved), before making the situation larger than it ever was. for sometimes not caring, contrary to what anyone may say, when it's shitty to even care. though, it seems like it was my little joke. my major mistake. not to sure where this will take me and eye don't really care. the future past and present all exist simultaneously and it feels like eye'm still straining to see. it means this natural disaster that eye am must be carried out virtuously. leaving you was like leaving the best of me. like saying the only good you don't have to explain is good bye. and you did complain say it to my face look into my eyes. and even though this pains me it is best for our lives. solitude. at this point eye am screaming in a place eye now call home. im scared im scared im scared of alone. havent been by myself long enough always had someone there it shouldnt be bad eye'm really the only one cares. just longing to love myself just as much as i love you. eye have to find out how and you'd never know so just leave me alone. she is natural. everyone she encounters never completely grasps her mind captivates all she doesnt give a fuck doesnt know why shes so popular they give her shit she doesnt need take all she has but not her its tragic. she is disaster.

not me though lol