wounds bleed fresh

It's been a while since I've last seen you. You talk about change, but in all honesty we can't. I'm sorry you're so hung up on the fact that our distance has changed you. That it has allowed you to grow up and progress? Sincerely, I doubt it. I've been in your shoes too often to believe these new weekly "I'm a changed man" speeches. Yes, you have changed, your outter existence has changed. Mentality only progressed... for the worst. Our conversations are usually about the past which was more than 3 years ago. I am definately not that girl, and I'd like you to stop talking about her. I'm molding myself to become more resistent. And yea.. I knowww you and youuu want me to be an open book, but this time I won't feed into the bullshit you enjoy seeing me believe. I'd grow, maybe even prosper and become more self reliant. That girl was pure-- I'm tainted and I've been used and I've accepted what I've become. I like my raw, nonchalant, fuck the world attitude. Because I only see myself in it. I can only see my struggles, my hardships, my pains. I'm sorry when you speak to me about 'how much you've changed' I don't have the right responses. I give you all of my raw emotion and you either have to take it or not. I understand you're going through it but so am I... so is everyone. Those little arguments with your mom, your sister, and your MIA dad aren't new to me. Debates with your fmaily, the ones you'd die for, shouldn't make you a changed man. Females you've been with shouldn't changed you either. But I understand you're like me, we're to tainted people living in the world we made up. Where only me and you exist. Dwelling on the past, we believe that when you return we'll be what we were... you said i was impossible to read, well imagine me now. It'll be easier to move on and to still keep in touch instead of forcing this to work out. Its like spraying perfume on shit. well.. c'est la vie, we'll figure it out i guess. till next time.


- frio- april fools?