Dear Latin Guys,

It's me again. Your dulce de leche; the one you crave but worry about what your "boys" might say because I don't speak that "me da, me da" crap. Well I got something for you. I WON'T subject myself. I WON'T be your caramel "spanish" prototype. I don't want the shh, kind of relationship. The ones where, you whisper me something, but tell your friends and family something else. I won't get pregnant early; espicially since you want to keep me hidden anyway. I will not listen to how different you thought a black girl might be, because in actuality all females are generally the same. I will not allow you to call me nor my brother a "nigga" or any of your friends. Don't call me a "cocolo", because I will call you a "spic" or a gringo/guala(gwala). I will not have anal sex; unlike your female counterpart I care about where your penis goes. I will not have sex with you-- your cousin-- your friends OR ANYONE BUT YOU while I'm with you. I will not straighten my hair, you told me you was feelin' me when my hair was in naps, so you'd better like it now. If you don't like my, kinky hair and all, then STICK IT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT!