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Saturday, January 15, 2011

piece of shit.

i've been through enough. i've had enough. being unable to verbalize my emotions, i am at a loss. like i've said times before, i attract alphas. we move the same our walks are synchronized we breathe in unison, but you and i somewhere down our many journeys failed to do so. you fell short somewhere. the only thing i came up with is your lack of melanin and my lack to adjust. my apologies. my apologies for being so easy to love. it is not hard for me to adapt. which i do so well. when i lay with someone my body fits every time. often when we leave my home together you fail to match my rhythm. you got me trippin, displaying public affection public anger. in public, you ignore me for shits and giggles you are more vigilant of your surroundings than the shit you've been doing to piss me off which builds up i might add. i can't stress any longer how much the minutia mistakes make a tremendous difference in how i view you. besides, while i was with you i have always said i am better alone or with an alpha. reasons i have tried so hard to over look the situation, was my love for you, the longevity (as you pointed out), and because you wanted to possess me when i had no interest in you. indeed mum was right about you playing with her daughter. i still can not fathom how you fail to see your faults. indeed i am an "asshole/bitch" (which is what you've called me, verbatim) but women are usually called such when they display some sort of control when they act as bosses and want what they want with no explanation. although, i am not praising myself, i want you to humble yourself. i want you to know, even though you believe otherwise, that i was never out to hurt you. there are times when i am silent in hopes you will somehow grasp why, but you don't. instead you make up shit "oh i know this face! isis is thinking...." i guess it's a hint for me to share, but i don't. my fault. you constantly ask me why people listen to me, why does anyone waste their time believing shit i say and i honestly have no answer. shit, i forget though i forget you enjoy the cute stuff you like pets i forget to not be as sensitive as most as i should. i am so small and fragile inside and you forget that too. i've been this way for as long as i can remember. while you sit there and try to figure it out try to understand how innocent my words are. there was never enough bliss, than when we kissed my words don't travel far and with every scar old and new i cant seem to understand why i am so pressed on going downstairs to you. he is a piece of me. now i see.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lol, I love you too baby.

just a girl said...

you always know isis, always.